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Monday 11 February 2013

The (sad) pursuit of e-popularity

Oh, social media, you never fail to surprise me.
In my e-lifetime to date I've experienced numerous annoying viral social media born campaigns.

Share this status if you want to get rid of AIDS! 
Like this photo of my ticket and I'll give you £1,000,000 if I win the lottery!  
Urban legends which urge you to re-post this status in the next 4 minutes, or else 28 kittens will get hit by a truck. (The emotive ones always work a treat.)

Just when we thought we'd seen it all... Welcome the 'If I get 1 million likes' phenomenon. 

It's like anything, at first it's quite comical - some shy boy who eats his feelings (and everything else) wants to sleep with the hottie, and she only agreed to it because she never in a million years assumed it'd go viral, and so we click that electronically generated blue thumbs up. Like. We laugh. We laugh at how hysterically excited he will be when he shows her the "evidence". We laugh at the thought of her face when she realises she's sold herself online, both visually and physically. We perhaps share said photo.  
And then what? Unless they actually somehow manage to inform us fellow million likees that they have actually achieved their goal, what do we gain from this situation? Absolutely bugger all. Did he get to travel to England from Japan to buy fish and chips? Did she sleep with him? Did she actually run around the city naked? No idea. And, to be honest, after you've supported them in their quests, do you even remember liking it? Again, probably not.

So what is the deal with this unending desire to be approved of by strangers online? People will do anything online for their taste of fifteen minutes. The wilder, the better. Whether it's seeking re-tweets, likes, LOLs or shares, the world has become obsessed with strangers making their decisions for them. 
And this makes me sad. It's such thoughtless validation, and at some point it's going to end in tears. I can't help but feel that it leaves you with an unsettling thought of a new digital era in which nothing can define us more in life than our extravagant pursuit for internet fame.


Monday 4 February 2013

I know everything about you (from Facebook)

Facebook has the power to destroy a relationship. Fact. Well, a potential one anyway.
 
The fact that the site actually has a term, 'Facebook stalking', is creepy enough. You're having a chat with someone, you ask what they're up to and you get the response: "Not much really, having a quick Facebook stalk and then I'll get in the bath." 

Silence.

AT LEAST subconsciously, you must be questioning when it became socially okay to declare your prying on strangers profiles publicly.

The worst part by far has got to be when you're in a bar, you look around and see Sally who you technically actually don't know, but you know she's got a boyfriend who she's just celebrated her 12 hour relationship with and she loves going to the cinema on Wednesdays and her mum calls her Sweetiepie Sally. 
You know too much. And you don't know her. That's bad enough as it is...

...Let's just hope you're not one of those who forgets that Sally doesn't actually don't know you, because she hasn't spent hours stalking your virtual life, and you ask "Hey Sal, how was the cinny on Wed?" -- n.b. at this point, she either walks away - which realistically is probably the most desired situation for you - or she, rather awkwardly, asks how on earth you knew she was at the cinema - and for heaven's sake just make out you were there too! No one publicly confesses to this shit!

It's the same when it comes to boys/potential romantic interests (PRIs) though. Too much trawling, and you think you know them before you actually do. At least give him/her a chance to defend themselves against that hideous photo you found! 
I think that right now there's a strong risk of excessive Facebook stalking either:
a) putting off you eventually meeting because there's no desire to 'get to know' them 
or
b) putting you off them altogether - oops.

The fun of meeting people is about starting from scratch and building relationships, but Facebook gives you this weird one up from the start, and it can turn out to be one of the best platforms ...or the shockingly worst.

Sunday 3 February 2013

Boys that bore you.

Valentines Day is coming up. Yay.

Although if I'm being frank, last year I was dreading it - and this was when I was in a relationship - so I'm quite looking forward to a night of, erm, "me time". Don't you just hate people who overuse that word?!

I like to think it's normal that 99% of the time I just love being alone. Not alone in the sense of no friends, family or human interaction ('cos that would be just plain weird), just independent from the confusing relationship game/situation/whatever it is. 

And then there's that 1% of the time when you kinda wish you had someone. Note: this is normally on nights when your friends want to do a 'double date' type of scenario. I was having that 1% moment the other day, and it got me thinking. 

When I look back to my first 'proper' relationship, I was infatuated by the fact that a boy wanted me so much. Overlooking character traits, personality and so on, under this spell of infatuation I proceeded into a steady relationship (big mistake). Lust is worlds apart from love, however I think it's a case of you need to be in a shit situation to realise what you definitely DON'T want next time.

So now I'm picky, shoot me. 

It's like I can meet a nice guy, he's pretty ideal, good looking and so on and then I'm just stuck. Numb. Cold. (Heartless?!) I hope not.

Something in me has definitely changed though.

Before, I'd meet a guy and get all girly and giddy and want to talk to them loads and I'd check my phone and check it again in case they had text me but I hadn't seen it - which e v e r y girl has done at one point, don't even deny it. And then I'd check it again 2 minutes later. And it seems that nowadays, something's changed. 

I'm not really sure what it is. I think I've just realised that you don't have to settle for second best. I'd honestly rather wait 10 years to find the right type of man, then 10 minutes to find the wrong. This isn't about being vain, or 'up yourself', it's about respecting yourself enough to be with someone who respects you, challenges you intellectually and meets your expectations.

Maybe this is maturity.  Maybe this is what I need.  Maybe this is girl hell.
I'm not quite sure where this new found picky-ness has come from, but I've a feeling it's here to stay.